Posts Tagged ‘ADHD coach’

How to make decisions

Thursday, March 18th, 2010

Back in January, I wrote about how difficult it is for people with Attention Deficit / Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) to make decisions. I suggested making choices based on who you want to be instead of who you’ve been in the past. That’s great advice for those big decisions like staying in college  vs. going pro, but what about the small stuff? Like which GPS to buy?

There are two extremes when it comes to making decisions: People who shoot from the hip, and people who spend way too much time analyzing and ruminating, stuck in indecision. Surprisingly, the solutions are nearly the same regardless of which end of the spectrum you’re on.

Here are some steps you can follow to make better decisions more easily:

  • Determine how much time to spend on the decision.  Set a deadline for yourself, or determine an appropriate amount of time to spend making a choice.  If you tend to make impulsive decisions, this will help you be more methodical.  If you usually spend too much time, this will help you rein things in.
  • Define your requirements.  What is your goal?  Spend a few minutes thinking through what it is that you’re trying to accomplish.  It doesn’t matter if you’re choosing a college or deciding whether to accept a party invitation, being crystal clear about what you want - and why - will ensure the best outcome.
  • Go on a fact finding mission.  Spend some time researching your options without evaluating them.  You’re just gathering information at this point.  Trying to decide before you have all the facts complicates things immensely.
  • Consider the consequences of each choice.  What will it cost you?  What will you gain?  It’s okay to consider your emotions.  “I just want to” is perfectly valid, as long as you’ve considered the other factors as well.
  • Compare your options to your requirements.  Which option will get you closest to your goal?  I use a spreadsheet for more complicated decisions like whether or not to buy a new car.  There’s an example on the resources page of my web site:  http://www.adhdsolutions.net/SampleDecisionSpreadsheet.xls
  • Evaluate.  Does anything jump out as the answer?  If so, you’re done.  If not, eliminate the options that don’t make sense and consider those that remain.
  • Do the “yum-yuck” test.  Think about each option, and note how it makes you feel.   The one that is more “yum” than “yuck” is probably the winner.
  • Follow Occam’s Razor.  This is the principle that “entities must not be multiplied beyond necessity”.  In other words,  when all things are equal, the simplest option tends to be the best one.
  • Last resort:  Flip a coin.  If the choice is still not clear after you’ve gone through all this, just pick something.  You may be fighting perfectionist tendencies, which include a fear of being wrong. It’s okay to be wrong sometimes!  If you’ve gone through this process, you’ve done everything you can to make an informed decision.  You’ve done your due diligence.  Make a choice and move on.  Even if it doesn’t work out, you can take pride in having made a well thought out decision in a timely manner.

What are you having for dinner?  What are you doing this weekend?  What career will you pursue?  Life is full of decisions.  Here’s hoping these tips help you make them wisely.

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Take it one step at a time - literally

Thursday, August 6th, 2009

“Take it one step at a time” is sound advice for anyone when things get overwhelming.  It’s especially helpful for those of us with ADHD.   If the whole project is too much to deal with, just identify the first step and focus on that.

I take this advice literally as a transitioning strategy.  When I’m lying on the couch watching TV or reading a book, and it’s time to go to bed, it’s almost impossible to get up.   Turning off the TV and making the arduous climb up all 14 stairs seems like way more than I can handle.  So I procrastinate.

I know how important it is to get a good night’s sleep, though.  I really want to be able to focus tomorrow.  I won’t be able to do that without enough sleep.  So I do what any responsible person would do:  focus on my left foot.

All I have to do is put that one foot flat on the ground, next to the couch. It takes every ounce of energy, but I can do that much.  Then I wait about 30 seconds to get used to this somewhat uncomfortable position.  Then I focus on my right foot.  I put it flat on the ground, next to my left foot.  Do you realize how hard it is to lay on the couch with both of your feet flat on the floor?  Yes, it’s very hard.  It’s much easier to just sit up.  And once you’re sitting, with just a little more effort, you can be standing.  Does this sound crazy?  Slightly ridiculous?  Maybe.  But it works for me every time.

Late night TV watching not your demon?  How about the internet?  I have one for that too:  Just click the “X”.

Like the TV, it takes Herculean effort to resist the internet’s late night charm.  If I think about stopping my research and making that arduous climb up all 14 stairs, it’s just too much.  But I can focus on the little “X” in the upper right corner of my browser window.  I just have to click it, and like magic, the internet is gone.  And I can get some sleep.

Transitioning is hard for people with ADHD, especially when we’re hyperfocused and tired.  This strategy just might make it a little easier.

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